A Daily Inventory

Immediately following the 9^th step promises from the AA big book is the 10^th step.

This thought brings us to Step Ten, which suggests we continue to take personal inventory and continue to set right any new mistakes as we go along. We vigorously commenced this way of living as we cleaned up the past. We have entered the world of the Spirit. Our next function is to grow in understanding and effectiveness. This is not an overnight matter. It should continue for our lifetime. Continue to watch for selfishness, dishonesty, resentment, and fear. When these crop up, we ask God at once to remove them. We discuss them with someone immediately and make amends quickly if we have harmed anyone. Then we resolutely turn our thoughts to someone we can help. Love and tolerance of others is our code.

And we have ceased fighting anything or anyone - even alcohol. For by this time sanity will have returned. We will seldom be interested in liquor. If tempted, we recoil from it as from a hot flame. We react sanely and normally, and we will find that this has happened automatically. We will see that our new attitude toward liquor has been given us without any thought or effort on our part. It just comes! That is the miracle of it. We are not fighting it, neither are we avoiding temptation. We feel as though we had been placed in a position of neutrality - safe and protected. We have not even sworn off. Instead, the problem has been removed. It does not exist for us. We are neither cocky nor are we afraid. That is our experience. That is how we react so long as we keep in fit spiritual condition.

It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition. Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God's will into all of our activities. "How can I best serve Thee - Thy will (not mine) be done." These are thoughts which must go with us constantly. We can exercise our will power along this line all we wish. It is the proper use of the will.

Much has already been said about receiving strength, inspiration, and direction from Him who has all knowledge and power. If we have carefully followed directions, we have begun to sense the flow of His Spirit into us. To some extent we have become God-conscious. We have begun to develop this vital sixth sense. But we must go further and that means more action.

Avoiding selfishness, dishonesty, resentment and fear is huge progress in my life and my thinking.   To cease fighting anyone or anything is a wonderful bonus.  Improving my relationship with my higher power (even if only as an imaginary friend) greatly reduces that sense of always being alone and lonely—especially when in a crowd.

I have made my relationships with others a much higher priority in my life.   For years I knew it was better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.  Unfortunately my actions were ruled by a fear of avoiding loss by never having anything that I was afraid to lose.  That made for a lonely life that was angry, resentful and addicted.

I am grateful for the vastly improvements in my relationships and my mental health this year.  Writing my Gratitude blog is a powerful daily inventory which forces me to look at the blessings in my life instead of being focused on my shortcomings.   My life and thinking is a lot better than how it used to be.  I continue to make mistakes on a daily basis, but now I can own them and promptly admit my wrongs.