Forgiveness for Myself and Others

Lea and I are working our way through a Christian bible (redundant) oriented 12-step workbook.  We did not work on it in December and have worked on it a half-dozen times in the last two weeks.  We are almost done with the 8^th step.  Tonight’s topic was on forgiving ourselves and others for the harm with have done to ourselves.

She has not been able to forgive a family member for abuse done her as a child.  One the most powerful techniques I know of is to pray twice a day for two weeks (longer if needed) for those that have hurt us so badly that we are unable to forgive them.   If they are alcoholic, we can pray for them to get everything they want which would be a total curse for all the alcoholics I know.

In my first year of recovery years ago, I prayed for my mother to get all she wanted and be happy.   I doubt it helped her much.  It did help me get past lots of resentment and anger that I was carrying around against a broken person with whom I did not interact with.  I still don’t talk with my mother but do not carry much resentment towards her from past events—as long as I stay away from her toxicity.

By far and away, I have done more damage to myself and my life than what others have done to me.  It is vital that I forgive myself the damage I have done to myself.  Like everybody else, I was doing the best I could with the tools that I had.

I am grateful for the relief I get from anger and resentments via the healing power of forgiveness towards myself and others.