Lately, my mind has been more frequently replaying “old tapes” of
negative thoughts from experiences where I felt guilt or shame It takes me out of living in the present
moment, I feel bad and don’t like it.
The big book calls it morbid reflection cautioning us not to drift into
for that would diminish our usefulness to others.
While those old tapes suck, I have many tools develop along the way in
my recovery to help me do a better job of staying in the moment and not getting
sucked into a black hole of depression.
They are just thoughts. I am a
good person. I deserve to be happy. Playing those tapes helps no one.
I am grateful for better mental health tools to resist morbid
reflection, depression and using.
Self-compassion was one of the better tools for today. I am doing the best I can and it is a lot
better than how it used to be while in active addiction.
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