An Uneventful Day

Today was a nice pleasant sunny 70° day.  We went to the clinic and a meeting.  Lea went home after not feeling well.  I went to Ali’s Auto Repair and had the wheels changed from the old car to the new car since they are brand new Michelins.  Passed the emissions test as step one in the process of changing the title and registration to my name.   I went swimming for 90 minutes. 

People are strange in the pool.  The see me swimming laps and need to stand in my way.  A disproportionately large fraction of the time, it is east Asian people that were not born in the US.   Basically I see it as a cultural phenomenon.  Severely disabled people don’t seem to register as people to them in some circumstances.  After being swam into twice by one Chinese lady and having a Japanese guy stand in my way multiple times, I put up the rope that separates the open section of the pool from the therapy section.  Sharing the pool and playing nice with others doesn’t always work so well.   Oh well..

I explained the economic concept of the tragedy of the commons to Lea last week.   There were 6 adults in the pool and three of them managed to swim into each other one or more times.  A crazy Russian man in a walker even managed to race a stroke survivor for the double-wide door. Viewed from the right perspective, their failure to play well with others was uncanny.

After swimming, I went to the DMV agent at Crossroads Mall.  Unfortunately I was 15 minutes late and could not register my car today.  I will go again on Monday.  Then I came home, made an early dinner of chicken alfredo, washed the towels, watched a little college football, talked with Charlie by phone, and took a nap.

One of my dysfunctional survival mechanisms from childhood is to self-destruct when things are going okay.  I can get a sense of oppressive dread in knowing that I am going to get yelled at sooner or later.  In an attempt to make the world less chaotic, I would create a negative event.  It is insanely unhealthy behavior by any standard, but it does make the world seem more rational and less chaotic.

The topic at this morning’s meeting was faith, fear and god.  I had previously concluded a big part of my last relapse was due to my lies of omission in a lack of rigorous honesty.  Today I got a little more insight into my lies of omission stemming from a lack of faith and humility.

I am grateful for pleasant uneventful days where I stay out of my own way while seeking knowledge of god’s will for me and the power to carry that out.