I am grateful to have made it through the holidays with no permanent
damage due to emotional meltdowns, especially those caused by holiday stressors.
It was a pretty good holiday season with
a lot of healthy new behavior and only a little of the dysfunctional old
behaviors.
We Survived the Holidays
My friend Merri calls the time from Halloween to January 2nd
“the mean season” due to the emotional body blows so many of us suffer from
dealing with the chasm between expectations of Norman Rockwell families and
reality. It is tough enough for people
with relatively healthy families. For
those of us coming from dysfunctional families filled with alcohol, sex, and
drug abuse combined with random violence, the holidays are somewhere between
fearful and insanely stressful.
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Most families I have known and come to know have no quiet days of desperation rather than very very loud and clear terrible messages..I could not wait to move to California to live with my Granmother who never allowed people to act like assholes yelling and screaming, she would argue with her nasty daughter my aunt and tell her to leave politely, even though my aunt owned the tiny apt. she lived in next to her bar and restaurant my grandmother cooked each morning and evening for me..She said people who throw shit around you can see it in their eyes and face and they are miserable..Well my Grandmother died at about 100 in 2 years after I finally got to live with her, my aunt is still going strong alone and almost 100 now, her 3 marriages and distrust of men and most people never told me she was happy, sure she had money and power but for what, no one in my family could stand her or only wanted her money which of course she was never to give one damn dime, strangers I met became my family and they never treated me like that aunt did or my terrible dysfunctional family did if cancer had not killed my Mother the way my siblings acted and still act would surely have done..One can never pick one's family one can pick friends and to tell you the truth it is far far better, my friends don't steal, drink, drug it and are kind and loving to their familias and to me, have a good sober and happy 2015 you have a new life you know that and it has nothing to do with where you came from it certainly doesn't for me..keep up your helping others with your AA meetings and helping to keep sober and happy,!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteI meant to say if Cancer had not killed my mother and quickly when I was young the b.s. my siblings have done in life surely would have killed her and quiker than Cancer, one cannot imagine people going batcrapcrazy like they did after her untimely death you would have thought they were from outspace but they were from earth, I made damn sure to never have anything to do with them when I reached 18 and moved far far away and I am the better for it, never drank at all, no drugs, my hubs of 41 years never indulges his father & brothers and sister all have the disease for God's Sake, it destroys what little of a mind the person has drinking and drugging...so we live & always have lived peaceful, kind and lovely lives, just keep on doing you very best! you will be just fine and don't fret over coming from a family that was how can I say it, terrible, many many in our country have faced the same and have lived good lives, peacefully, soberly and happily, it can be done!~~~~~~~~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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