There is a once-a-month MESH (Members share Experience, Strength and Hope) Alanon speaker meeting in Shoreline/N.Seattle on the second Saturday that gives out 'coins' to celebrate the number of years in Alanon. Most Alanon meetings don't do that. Gigi and I went to the MESH meeting tonight. We both got 12 year coins. Her ex-bf was also there, he got a 16 coin.
I have learned a lot about having better relationships with others thanks to my Alanon program. My life is much better now that I have fantastically improved my abilities for setting & holding healthy boundaries with others. Still plenty of room for improvement, but at least those boundaries are at a functional level now. It was not always that way.
My ability to help others has also changed from horribly dysfunctional to reasonably useful. It used to be that I would figuratively pinch someone's arm if they told me they had a sore knee. It would take some of their focus off their knee...but they would be in even more pain and pissed off at me for being a jerk. Now I can empathize with them, express concern and possibly offer to help if it seems needed without suggesting a variety of obvious treatments that they undoubtedly already figured out for themselves such as put ice on their sore knee or go to a doctor.
I am grateful for my Alanon recovery. It is a wonderful resource when family of origin issues suddenly arise that would have distressed me in the past.
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