Avoiding Using Behavior

The insanity of addiction goes well beyond merely being intoxicated to a host of unattractive behaviors. 

I took D out to lunch today.  He gave up smoking cigarettes for a New Year’s Resolution.   He spent the money he saved on marijuana.  For a guy with a serious case of schizophrenia, this did not seem to be an improvement in what he smoked.  Usually I do okay with D.  Today was a rough day and I did not enjoy our time together.  After spending his money on drugs, he wanted $2 for cigarette rolling papers.   Only after I gave him the $2 did he tell me that he spent his money on pot this month.   That was annoying.  I am not interested in being tricked into subsidizing the drug use of others by being conned by some half-truth (at best).

On the way home, L wanted to stop by the Rite-Aid pharmacy and get the rest of an antibiotic prescription along with a few other things.   I told her not to dawdle.  She went in, came back 15 minutes later telling me that she had refilled some other Rx and would be right back out after she checked out.  Almost 10 minutes later, she finally came out and was ready to go.   There was three lies in that one stop at Rite-Aid.  1) She was just going to get her antibiotic; 2) she would be right back out; 3) she would not dawdle.  She acted surprised when I expressed being annoyed with her behavior.   The good news is that tomorrow she will have 60 days of not using street drugs.

I did make it clear that what she had done was unacceptable.  I did not make it clear that it was the three lies that were annoying—along with being stuck waiting for well over 20 minutes.  I will do that soon.

Don’t get me wrong, there are undoubtedly many less than perfect aspects to my personality and behaviors.  God knows I need help keeping my life together.  The good news is I am a lot better than how I used to be.

I am grateful for the progress we AA members have made in staying sober and having better relationships in our lives.


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