Serenity or living in the present moment

Before recovery, all of my adult life was spent living in the future as in 'someday I am going to be...happy, wealthy, successful, etc'. My past was too painful to spend much time in. There was never 'enough' while in the present moment.

Over time as my age and addictions progressed, the future could no longer be sugar-coated to be anything other than Hobbesian— solitary, poor, nasty, brutish and short.

It has taken years of recovery, therapy, mediation and other self-improvement methods for me to spend my days living in the present. One statement about the present is that it is a gift. The real blessing of living in the present for me is the gift of serenity. Taken individually, each of my days are good.

When I get sucked into doing some sort of life-evaluation, then my life and days come up short since I should clearly have and be so much more than what I have and am today. The slogan for that kind thinking is don't should've on yourself.

Today, I am grateful for my serenity and living in the present moment.

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